i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
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