We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
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