I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
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