Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Randomize