How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
thus making me awesome and them whores
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Randomize
