Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
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