So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
