We're facebook friends in real life
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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