then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
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