I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
