one word: firstdatebathroomanal
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Randomize