You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
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