no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
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