im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
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