would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
Randomize