yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
Randomize
