If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
