But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
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