their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Randomize
