Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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