if any two of us come back from the bar and aren't getting laid we will systematically destroy everything in the kitchen
and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
