is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
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