I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
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