so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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