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  Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.

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• Dont be an ass. They didn't say not to fuck on them. They're just asking for a considerate notification so that next time lunch isn't made with anyone's bodily fluids. Fuck, smoke, let a nigga know. Seems reasonable.

  Submitted by HippyChick on Apr 1, 12 at 10:29pm

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• "Our" counters implies that they're partially mine. So I'll do as I damn well please on them, thank you very fucking much. And while you're making lunch, fix me a sandwich.

  Submitted by Thompson11 on Apr 1, 12 at 7:11pm

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• things you don't want to hear one subway employee screaming to another one.

  Submitted by polacke on Apr 2, 12 at 12:26am

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• Free mayo!

  Submitted by WesPip on Apr 1, 12 at 2:41pm

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  • aaaaawwwggghhh(hand over face)

    Submitted by nunubeest on Apr 1, 12 at 5:49pm

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• No, sir. No I will not

  Submitted by SomeGuyNamedMike on Apr 1, 12 at 6:11pm

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