I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
