Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Randomize
