awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Church boner. Awkwardddd
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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