these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
He had one of those small greek statue penises
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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