ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Randomize
