I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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