i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
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