sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize