C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
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