i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
