my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Randomize