he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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