Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I wanna passion pit in your ass
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Come on in and take your pants off
Randomize
