You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
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