Have some text gold?

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  • Mary Magdalene was a prostitute.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 15, 09 at 4:37pm
  • Miguel, your English is great but I'm a redneck white supremacist so I'm turning you in to the government. -Jeff

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 15, 09 at 4:54pm
  • Hahaha I think this text is hilarious. People should just laugh and move on:)

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 15, 09 at 9:29pm
  • The language is too much for me. It's why I don't bring my kids with me anymore.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 15, 09 at 6:12pm
  • Don't act like if u weren't ugly u wouldn't strip too

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 15, 09 at 7:00pm
  • She's either baptist or catholic. What they do in the dark doesn't matter, so long as they pretend to be holier-than-thou.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 15, 09 at 4:14pm
  • hahaha im a methodist in this area!!!!! lmao!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 16, 09 at 5:03am
  • Look man, I'm the guy that sent this text to whomever submitted it. For real. I was at a shake joint. I can't deny that. But I saw the girl that said this to me at a Waffle House after hours. I just feel like that someone that shakes her twat for cash shouldn't lecture me on Jesus. That's all. It is pretty funny though, by the way.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 16, 09 at 2:14am
  • Fuck you 2;14 I sent this text. Bunch of liars.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 16, 09 at 2:45am
  • Not to mention, in order to be in the presence of said stripper, it can be assumed that you were at a strip club. Considering that you were at a strip club in the first place, she should not have expected much in your moral department, silly cunt.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 15, 09 at 4:43pm
  • She is totally moral, she strips for Jesus!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 15, 09 at 4:30pm
  • Literally no position. It's crazy hard to speak when doing the inverted open v.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 15, 09 at 4:21pm
  • Haha!! It was a christian strip joint... Lmfao!!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 16, 09 at 3:16am
  • Hi my name is Miguel and I am an illegal immigrant. I will clean your house for 20 pesos an hour. Please consider me, thanks. ~Miguel

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 15, 09 at 4:46pm
  • Well what position was she in?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 15, 09 at 4:45pm
  • Am I the only one who thought of Catcher in the Rye...?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 17, 09 at 1:21am
  • Y did u say it? that's the true question! -BTK

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 15, 09 at 6:17pm
  • Enh, technically, as long as she's not engaging in physical contact, she's just dancing. So, while anyone lecturing someone on using the word goddamit is annoying, she might just be one up on you still. Well, if we ignore that most people use religion for thinly veiled misogyny.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 16, 09 at 7:53am
  • Time to violate the no-touching rule a slap a hoe!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 15, 09 at 4:14pm
  • hehehe oh how i love you miss KCM!!!! slap dat hoee. xoxo CLS

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 19, 09 at 2:56am
  • maybe she was a nun? ive seen plenty of nuns get naked at strip clubs.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 15, 09 at 5:26pm
  • Already been said before... Damn these moderators suck!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 15, 09 at 5:29pm
  • Dudes that go to strip clubs are pathetic. If you are getting it good then you wouldn't have to shell out cash to pay for blue balls. Sorry fucks. Ha

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 16, 09 at 8:35am
  • 6:34 needs to lighten up. Seriously, it's a joke.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 16, 09 at 12:38am
  • just because she makes a living differently than YOU would deem "acceptable" does not mean that she is in any way "immoral". asshole

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 15, 09 at 6:34pm
  • I know that area code, and that area code I guarantee you she is either Baptist or Church of Christ

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 15, 09 at 4:27pm
  • So says the butthurt fatty

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 16, 09 at 9:45am
  • All the texts from Alabama and Mississippi are really lame.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 16, 09 at 8:22pm
  • 6:34 go ahead and do a reality check. strippers are a small step up from prostitutes. they have a loooong way to go before they are "moral"

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 16, 09 at 12:42am
  • Actually 8:35 makes a good point, and who uses the term butthurt fatty? Sound like a bunch of lame douches who only know how to look at women (whil paying cash for it)..but are never actually with women. Sounds fun...losers

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 16, 09 at 3:18pm
  • 6:34 - um, yes it does.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 15, 09 at 6:53pm
  • Wow this sounds eerily like a joke told by Dave Chappelle years ago about being lectured by a stripper for smoking in a strip club. Plagiarize much?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 29, 09 at 4:55pm
  • God made us naked, it's the government that makes us wear clothes.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 22, 09 at 10:55pm
  • she probably goes to FBC of Huntsville or Asbury Church of Christ... just sayin.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 4, 10 at 8:48am
    • ... Strangely, I think I know this person, too, as she has snapped at me before, as well.

      Submitted by Dracul on Feb 4, 11 at 1:44am
  • Maybe she only gives BJ's

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 15, 09 at 4:31pm
  • 4:27 there's also a lot of Methodists in that area code

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 15, 09 at 4:55pm
  • give her her tip using rolls of pennies. Maybe shove a few up her uppity ass and into her stinky cunt

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 15, 09 at 6:15pm
  • Damn those psychology majors !!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 15, 09 at 5:06pm
  • Was "goddammit" followed by "I'm outta cash"?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 15, 09 at 6:45pm
  • WTF is a butthurt fatty?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 16, 09 at 10:21am
  • 2:14 - 'whomever submitted it' ?? you don't know you sent this to?? I call bullshit on you.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 16, 09 at 5:30am
  • Moral standards are different.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 15, 09 at 6:22pm
  • should have punched her in the cunt

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 15, 09 at 4:21pm