I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
