Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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