K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
