how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
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Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
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I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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