Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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