Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
Randomize
