let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
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