He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Randomize
