Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
