Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
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