During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
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