I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
My vagina is very pro this idea
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
